It's quite simple. When it comes to behavior expectations, development matters...a lot! If we want to be able to create reasonable and fair expectations for a child, we have to have some background information about the child's development age and stage. If we choose not to take into account a child's age and stage, we will most likely create unrealistic expectations, which will cause lots of extra frustration for us and for them!
We can not change the age/stage our child is in, but we can accept it, understand it, and use that information to create a more supportive environment for our child to work on developmental tasks. Some ages/stages are extremely challenging, but there is likely some important learning and skill development that needs to go on during those times. It is sometimes hard to see, but if we look hard enough there are usually enjoyable things and challenging things about each age/stage.
We can not change the age/stage our child is in, but we can accept it, understand it, and use that information to create a more supportive environment for our child to work on developmental tasks. Some ages/stages are extremely challenging, but there is likely some important learning and skill development that needs to go on during those times. It is sometimes hard to see, but if we look hard enough there are usually enjoyable things and challenging things about each age/stage.
REMEMBER THIS...
IF YOU DON'T CONSIDER THEIR AGE/STAGE, YOU'RE MORE LIKELY TO CREATE UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS AND EXTRA FRUSTRATION FOR YOU AND YOUR CHILD
Jean Illsey Clarke's theory has helped me understand my children's development more clearly. In her theory the developmental task is something that the child is continually working on during that stage, which helps explain some of their behaviors. It also states that we sometimes cycle back through previous stages. Check out the link below to learn about this theory and Clarke's child developmental stages and tasks.
